Self Confidence: What It's Really About

The other day one of my clients asked me what the different components of self-confidence are. I've done a lot of research on anxiety and stress management and confidence building especially during my time on clinical faculty at The Center for Treatment and Study of Anxiety at The University of Pennsylvania, but I've never come across a formula of what exactly creates self confidence.

I thought about it. And I realized there are a TON of things. If I need to pick the top 4, here's what I came up with:

1. Esteem. This is composed of both self-esteem (how you feel about yourself) and your esteem in the eyes of others. Self esteem, as you know, is about how you see yourself. If you see yourself as typically capable, then you're likely to feel more confident in various situations. Others' esteem is how capable other people see you. If you know that others' esteem is typically positive, you'll feel more confident.
2. Competence. Competence is composed of your natural abilities and talents (things like IQ and personality which are relatively stable and unchangeable) and your skill and knowledge (information you've acquired). Emotional intelligence (EQ) relies on both natural talents and learned abilities and is a big factor in competence. When you are knowledgeable about a topic and have prepared well, you will feel more confident to speak about that topic.
3. Results. This is the history of your actions. If you can recall a time when you've achieved an excellent result in a similar or related situation in the past, your confidence will go up. Likewise, if you refer to specific results when you're promoting yourself, you will get a better response (than if you promote vague accomplishments), and your confidence will rise.
4. Mindset. Given the name of my blog, you could've guessed this one, right? A success mindset is truly everything. Research shows that the way you interpret a situation and your capabilities is significantly more important than the situation or your capabilities themselves. If you have the mindset that you can excel or at least handle something, you will be more confident. With the right mental map, you can have stellar confidence which allows you to take risks and get better results (which of course leads into #3- See how it's all related?).

Which aspects of these 4 components are stronger for you? Which are less strong?

How have these components helped you to feel more (or less) confident in various situations?

Thanks for reading!

Larina Kase  

(Here's a new photo that my awesome photographer Alisa Karn recently took. It's a bit more "me" [outdoorsy] than some of the others.)

Comments

[Clephane W]

Larina,
you could not have said it any better. It all begins in the mind. I need to believe in me and my abilities (positive self-awareness) before anyone does. As I feel good about myself, I will be able to move confidently and my achievements will be great.

[Larina]

Thanks for the comment, I agree!
:)

[steven davies]

I work in a Center for Treatment and Study of Anxiety and I completely agree with your top 4 picks.
Nice post Larina.

[Larina]

Thanks so much, Steven, that means a lot coming from you given your expertise with anxiety. Cheers,
Larina